For the guys and for the girls
For the Guys:
We must strive to be a “priest, prophet, provider, and protector” for her in the name of Christ. What this means is that we are to teach and witness to our future family as the earthly example of Christ. As a provider it means if e’er there’s a point in life where someone has to go without….we’re first. As a protector we are to guard the heart of the one Christ allows us to marry and we are to defend His truth within our family as well as outside. We must protect our future marriage with our lives.
And to all guys that may be reading this, it doesn’t stop there. These are just qualities we MUST have to even be worthy in the eyes of a woman of God. God knows we won’t be perfect at them, but He doesn’t want us to ever stop working at it.
Aside from this, we need to be aware of and learn the love language of that significant other. We may not be “quality time” people or “gifts” people but “she” may be. So speak her “language” and let her know that you love her as Christ does, not as your flesh desires to.
Christ’s life and all through scripture we are given examples of how to treat the woman God has placed in our lives/will place in our lives, but let me just say this as a regular guy:
Unless she loves football, sports, nerd stuff, and random guy things….DON’T TALK ABOUT THEM! Time after time I have to hold myself back from laughing when a group of single guys somehow is blessed to be sitting at a table/hanging out/etc. with a larger group of single girls…and the guys talk about sports and are inconsiderate of the girls around them. One would think that a guy’s first inkling would be to introduce themselves to these girls, nevermind the fact that they may be incredibly attractive in Christ, but no. Instead they retreat to talking about sports and inso doing, prolong their single-ness which they will later complain about.
Guys, read this carefully. Girls are people too. I know it’s hard to believe that at times they can carry on a conversation more interesting than college football, but believe me, there are greater things in life than football and a woman who loves God with all her heart is definitely….DEFINITELY one of them.
To the girls:
The word “submissive” is so often taught as the “get in the kitchen and make me a sandwich” mentality and it disgusts me. What the root of the word is that a woman must be willing to love and support the most Godly man in their lives, someone who loves Christ with every ounce of passion they have in them. What kind of girl wouldn’t want that kinda guy?!
In Genesis, when Adam and Eve fell, what God said to Eve was “you will desire the position of your husband but he will be over you.” That does not mean better, but what it means is that God has placed a certain man in your life who will be charged with teaching you, learning with you, and diving into God’s word more and more so that you two grow closer together. You are a team and as a team there are different “positions” to play. It does not mean guys are better, we just have a different role to play and will sacrifice our lives to make sure that you and the future family know the love of Jesus Christ.
Be the woman in Proverbs 31 that God outlines. No, it doesn’t mean you have to knit or all that other fun stuff. Proverbs is describing the woman’s heart, not her actions. Actions are just examples of where the woman of God’s heart is. “Let your heart be so hidden that a man has to be seeking Christ to find it.”
One of my friends shared an awesome quote that I want to share. It goes along the lines of impatience. I know it’s crazy hard to wait for that perfect 10/10 that God is building up, but NEVER settle for a 9/10. God never fails and God doesn’t ever disappoint so hold out for Him.
The quote reads: “Dance with Jesus and He’ll let the perfect guy cut in.” You don’t have to worry about finding the dance partner, Christ is already doing that for you and life situations that hurt, cause you to question who you are , whether you’ll be alone, are just situations that Christ is using to strengthen you so that when He brings your dance partner along, you will KNOW how much you are loved by Him and by our Lord. Just remember though, for this lifetime you get to dance with the guy Christ points out, but at the end of the dance we call life, Christ is still the man taking you home. Christ always comes before your dance partner…ALWAYS.
Lastly [from me] guys don’t speak “hint” language. We speak “blunt” and “obnoxious.” That’s the only way to get through to us, but if you are both in Christ, it shouldn’t even be an issue to speak truth to one another even if it makes you feel weird.
To both: Love one another as Christ has loved you no matter what. A husband and wife’s relationship is more important than the relationship from father to child. If the mother to father relationship is not established in Christ then how could we even begin to teach future kids?
Here are some interesting statistics I will leave you with:
In a family of four [father.mother.son.daughter]:
If the daughter is a Christian and no one else is, the chance the family will follow her is around 7%
If the mother is a Christian and no one else is, the chance the family will follow her is around 9%
If the son is a Christian and no one else is, the chance the family will follow him is around 11%-13%
Now I want you to read this carefully: If the father is a Christian, the chance that the family will follow his leadership is 98%
So guys, do you see what it’s so important for you to be the most Godly man/father you can be? And girls, do you see why it’s so very important that you support his leadership? The percentages aren’t even close. from 13%-98%….I don’t know about you but I’m not willing to play with those odds.
Love authentically. Love in truth. Love without a reason. Love as Christ loved. Love your enemies until they ask “why?”, and Love one another as Christ has Loved you.
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